i had one of those lucid dreams again that i found myself tugging along the late hours of the morning. it was raining, like real life, and the water droplets that hit the oversized puddle by the shed sparkled like firecrackers, glowing with reds and blues and golds. somehow the rope would get loose and the dream would take the form of things i purposely don’t think about, like losing him and wanting to reconnect with them. i saw a flickering of a lighter and the plume of smoke and my heart ached for something i hated. in him and in me. and i stirred... and i’m left thinking about the fragmented remainders of what the dream wanted but i regain a hold of that rope and pull pull pull the damn thing until the slack is gone.